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Things change after you been married for a number of years I guess.
You were a dream boat to your wife back then. Now you’re like an old tug boat pushing barges around the harbor. Yeah my wife has this look that says damn what the hell was I thinking?
She gives me that look like why are you still here? I wake up sometimes and she is just staring at me in my sleep. Looking at me like she contemplating some things. I woke up one time and she had a mirror under my nose and when my eyes opened she was like “damn”! I’m like “what the f…k is you doing”.
She just waiting for my ass to pass. My wife has our insurance agent on speed dial.
She’s always asking me “how are you feeling”? I told her I had a pain in my arm and she was like “which one”! “You might be having a heart attack”. She started walking away and I said where you going?
She said to get the papers just in case. Yeah she’s always giving me ailments.
I can see it now. I could pass out and hit the floor.
My kids would be saying dial 911 and she’d say “hold on let’s think about this”. I can hear her telling my son “he was a good father but was he really a great father”? That dude would probably pause and sit on that a minute. “Don’t you remember all of those whippings”?
“I was the one there drying your tears”.
I’m laying there hearing this B.S. like “ain’t this a bitch”?
You be like “with my last breath” take em both wit ya. I had to think fast so I motioned for her to come close . “I—forgot—to pay— The— Policy— This— month”. I was fading fast and she reached under the bed and pulled out one of those portable defibrillators and zapped my ass back to life.
“You MF I be damn if you going to stick me with another bill”.
Written By: Larry D. Miller
Larry D. Miller has over 20 yrs. in the field of crisis intervention as a call center Supervisor for a national crisis hotline. Larry has authored a book titled “How to cheat and not get busted” is currently available at:http://www.authorthouse.com and many online book retailers. Larry is a contributing writer for ms.Nix in the Mix http://msnixinthemix.com/
